<!--
.. title: Better Left Unsaid
.. slug: better-left-unsaid
.. date: 2022-03-12 14:36:15 UTC-08:00
.. tags: communication, psychology
.. category: 
.. link: 
.. description: 
.. type: text
.. previewimage: /images/woman_shushing.jpg
-->

Saying something is "better left unsaid" implies distaste - that the thought
behind the words was inappropriate, and self-moderation would be wise.

I offer you an alternative meaning - considering what or what not to say is not
inherently self-censorship. Instead, it is expressive power.

<!-- TEASER_END -->

![Woman shushing](/images/woman_shushing.jpg)

This is [not a new idea](https://archive.org/details/pdfy-2_qp8jQ61OI6NHwa) (few
are). But it is an important concept, worth investigation and introspection.
What follows (and already began) is a recursive examination of some elements of
saying and not saying things.

Consider the preceding paragraph - each word was chosen. Even when semantically
restricted, synonyms are readily available. Grammar can be direct, or it might
be creatively elaborated upon with a colorful plentitude of adverbs and similar,
arguably gratuitous, constructions.

References are an important element - the choice to link to Strunk and White
both provides a valuable and relevant resource, as well as signals a
quasi-academic perspective. The parenthetical "(few are)" is an indulgence, an
attempt to share a stream of consciousness. It can strengthen the connection
with the reader, but if an author does it too often the result is simply hard to read.

Declaring a concept "important" is not about importance - merely including
something means it is important, in the context of the writing. But explicitly
invoking importance carries emphasis - furthering that with nouns like
"investigation" and "introspection" is an attempt to provoke critical thought,
and suggest that it is relevant both to the world and the self.

Closing with a reference to recursion is dubious - there is no true functional
recursion here. A more accurate term would be
[self-reference](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-reference) - but recurion is
both more concise and popular (due to the general commercial success of
computers). So, the author made the editorial decision to use the term, despite
the slight imprecision.

Of course, the whole thing could be shorter:
```
This isn't new - but it matters. This post shows why.
```

The same ideas can be communicated in 10 words, instead of the original 36. And
the following 5 (and counting) paragraphs would not be needed as well. Verbosity
is additional emphasis - even writing at all is a conceit. My posts
[begin as notes](/posts/notes-as-closure/) and are edited and
refined, and so I (as author) have experienced multiple permutations of the
ideas which you now read (an earlier version of the focal paragraph was 39
words).

Would this post have been better if it started with the briefer option? Maybe -
but it wouldn't have been this post. When a writer chooses to fixate, it is
because they wish the reader to follow them somewhere. Yes, omit needless words
- but remember why you need words in the first place.

This post could have excluded considerations of psychology and linguistics, and
focused solely on logical points. But then the following paragraphs wouldn't
have been an analysis of the first one, and though perhaps the whole thing could
be rewritten without any self-reference, it would cause a difference experience
and therefore carry a different message.

And of course, that is the actual point here! This post is about both thinking
through the specifics, and comparing to an imagined simpler post. Such an idea
requires a bit of detail to express, and using self-reference allows us to
experience it while also thinking through it. For instance - imagine if the
preceding two paragraphs were deleted. This post would still work, and might
even be better, save for the fact that I wouldn't be able to make this point.

Flowery writing can be a means to an end, as a way to gain attention and express
nuance. But not all linguistic silliness is good - if it doesn't further the
idea you wish to express, it inevitably detracts and confuses your audience.
Silliness for the sake of it only works if that is the idea you want to share.

Expression is a balancing act. If you have something to say, say it. If you have
accompanying thoughts, ones that add color (at least for you) but don't help
others understand the idea - don't say them. They are better left unsaid.
